Updated: Nov 7
It’s only 3:45 am and already this morning I'm involved in a deep discussion about God, faith, healing, apple cider vinegar, coconut oil and unexpected second chances at love… with my Uber driver, Hans.
Already this trip to Laguna Beach feels magical and divinely guided. Hans went through a terrible divorce. Takes about 3 years to recover, he says.
Now, he’s blissfully in love and move to Nashville to help his girlfriend deal with a rare form of early onset dementia that affects vision.
He's reversed it 70% by having her take 2 tablespoons of coconut oil a day.
I've heard about this. There is solid science behind how our brains need good fats to stay healthy.
Hans gives me a great big hug before dropping me off at my gate. And I'm off to Laguna Beach!
This is going to be a uniquely healing trip.
I arrive on time in Denver and head straight to find Mindy. We're ecstatic to see each other. It's been 5 years. Too long.
We grab a coffee and catch up. Soon enough, it's time to board our connecting flight into Orange County.
Mindy has been through a lot of broken heartedness with her last two relationships as well. We both really need this.
We spend the first day getting settled in and walk down the beach, reliving all the trauma of our failed love relationships over the past 10 years.
We get pizza and wine and eat on our balcony overlooking the ocean.
We're supposed to write our manifesto to create our dream relationship and attract our new men… but we're pretty tired. I come in to take a shower and by the time I get out, Mindy is down for the count. I envy how easily she goes to sleep.
I miss Joey.
The next morning, we get up and head over to Urth Café. They have the best coffee in the world, hands down, I tell Mindy.
Next we change into our bathing suites and head down to the ocean. We pray, we meditate, we walk. Then we wash the sand off our feet and lay out by the pool.
This is how our days progress over the next 4 days. Coffee ocean, pool… then clean up and explore the town. Then dinner. Then walk the ocean again at sunset.
Then hang out in the room, maybe watch a movie (one night we watched, “Hey God, it's me, Margaret”- Fantastic movie!!) and early to bed.
She's the perfect companion for this trip.
The time goes by fast.
We talk for hours and hours about our Joey's (Mindy just broke up with a Joey as well.) And she is seriously the most empathetic person I've ever known.
It's healing to have someone to listen to all my regrets, anger, sadness and disappointments as well as the good memories I'm grieving.
I begin to not only envision a new life for myself but to also believe it's POSSIBLE.
Mindy thinks I need to develop these “Divorce Chronicles” into a book or Netflix series. Sort of an Eat, Pray, ove meets Bridget Jones Diary but for people going through divorces.
I mean, that's about half the population. So it's needed.
“Then, you can continue to write, help others and live anywhere you want… like here in Laguna Beach,” Mindy proclaims.
I believe her. This feels like a calling. Writing has always felt like my calling. And I've always wanted to somehow help others by doing it.
Something uniquely magical happened on this trip and I'm not even sure what it is yet.
We fly back to our different cities alone.
I'm happy to see my pets but it feels like I'm walking back into a house and a life that has long since died.
I feel awful.
I clean, unpack and head to the store.
When I get into the car, my iPad automatically comes on and starts playing Ludovico. It has never done this before. This was what Joey always played on our ipods when we went on trips or drove along the Maine coast.
It makes me want to cry. Tears start welling up in my eyes.
I quickly hit the knob and turn it off.
I'm not crying! Not today anyway.
I hope God has some surprises and a new path for me and I hope he starts to reveal it soon.
But for now, I’m here in the in between.
A very creative, painful and uncomfortable place to be.
To be continued…